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11-14-2007, 11:02 AM babysitter4ever Joined on 11-14-2007 Be nice - I'm new! am i doing the right thing when these kids hit me? i watch 3 kids on a regular basis, and at one point or another, all 3 of them have hit me. the oldest boy just turned 6, the 3 yo boy has a mental disorder similiar to autism, and the girl is 2. when they do something wrong that i or the mother wouldn't approve of, she's told me not to let it slide by. i don't feel comfortable spanking another persons child considering i'm only 16 and it feels weird for me, but when they throw their fits, hit me cause they aren't getting their way, or hit one another, i pick them up and place them in their room and hold the door shut for 2-5 min. depending on what they did. i tell all 3 of them why they are going in time out while i'm carrying them there.the oldest screams bloody murder from the second i put him in his room and kicks the door, throws toys around, and yells at me, sometimes calling me names, but when i tell him (after his times up) that when he's calm he can come out, he quiets down real quick.then i open the door, get on my knees so i can look him in the eyes and ask him if he's ready to come out and then i ask him how he should have handled the situation (instead of hitting bubby, he should have asked him nicely to move, and if he didn't listen, then to come get me). after that i give him a hug, and everythings fine. this usually happens twice a night (i watch them from 4-9:30). the middle one, i do the same with, but when i put him in his room, he just sits there and cries softly and plays, when i go in to tell him his times up, he looks up, tears usually all over his cheeks,and says "sorry" before i can say anything, then he gives me a hug,(he's usually once a night) the youngest,is like the oldest, screaming from the second i put her down. and she continues to scream and yells "let me out" after i tell her her times up. when i open the door to let her out, she screams "go away" and screams "no" if i ask her if she wants to come out,so i let go of the door and walk away.she comes out on her own time, and then usually starts asking for juice. she's about once or twice a night. if i try to get down and talk to her after she's come out, she won't listen and screams "go away". if i just play with the boys and pretend she's not there for about 5 min. she starts playing with us, and everyones happy again. i've tried setting them on a chair or on a couch. they will not stay worth nothing. the only way i would be able to get any of the 3 of them to stay would be to literally hold them down. i had a big problem with the oldest last month, and the mom instructed me to do the whole room thing. i've just been doing that ever since...... am i doing the right thing with these kids. should i be handling these situations any differently?     Report

11-17-2007, 6:55 PM Mommy2Lots Joined on 11-15-2006 Houston,TX Super Sitter!! Re: am i doing the right thing when these kids hit me? Well, since the parent told you to do the room thing, I would say you're doing the right thing. I don't know about holding the doorknob. I wouldn't really do that unless you think that you or the child will get hurt if you don't. Otherwise, I really don't see anything wrong with your method. I think after a while, they will understand they can't hit and that if they do, in their bedroom is where they'll go. The only thing I will say about the bedroom is that I really don't like bedrooms to be used as timeout unless absolutely necessary because the bedroom should be a retreat, not a punishment area. Also, a punishment isn't a punishment if you're in the room where all your fun things are. But, since that's what the mom prefers, as the sitter, you really can't do anything about that part. I prefer to have a certain area that is for time-out, such as the bottom step heading upstairs or a certain corner of the play area, something like that. If it's the corner, you can have a particular chair or stool there for time-out. Anyway, for such a tough situation, I'd say you handled it pretty well. Parenting/Sitting Articles - If you view these, kindly return back to Babysitting Forums. ;-)    Report

11-20-2007, 1:50 PM paigy16 Joined on 05-31-2007 NY Along for the Ride Re: am i doing the right thing when these kids hit me? You are doing a great job just one sugestion is that you should not let the 2 year old walk all over u tell her that she can not leave till she comes out with a smile on her face this could take a while but with patience it can really work.I have personly used this technique and i would suggest it.   blondie    Report

11-23-2007, 2:28 PM Chosen7Stone Joined on 10-21-2005 Tallahassee, FL Super Sitter!! Re: am i doing the right thing when these kids hit me? I think you're going about it the right way.  The 2yo -- is she a young 2 or older 2?  (2 and how many months?) *Love in Christ from Mary* 1 Peter 2:4-5 Vote my agency, Seminole Sitters, the "Best Overall Business" in Tallahassee for the 2007 Tally Awards at EverythingTallahassee.com!!!    Report